Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Let`s get Rowdy College Girls to Cowboys

As both hands on the clock struck five I was on the edge of my seat, my legs were bouncing uncontrollably; I couldn’t keep it together much longer. As I looked around the room I could see the anticipation that lingered in the other councilors, everyone was shifting in their chairs. The week was over, campers were gone and it was time to begin our two day break.

“And that concludes our meeting, any other questions or comments?” All I could think about, was that someone better not stick up their hand and say anything. We all silently sat there giving the “stink eye”, hoping that it would detour anyone from dragging the meeting on any longer. The silence in the room concluded the meeting, then everyone bolted for the door; “Calgary here we come!” With three of us jumping on the trunk (barely making it close) we piled into the little silver Honda. We were ready for the five hours of driving, the energy in the car was high; I don’t know where it had come from. After six days of constantly being on the go I didn’t think I had any energy left. Boy was I wrong!

“So I just talked to Dave (the boy whose house we were staying at) and he said that he and his friends rented a limo for tonight! The only problem is that they ordered it to pick us up at 10pm” sighed, Emily from the back seat. Our first reaction was extreme excitement: “a limo, who goes in a limo for fun on random days? This is going to be sweet!” Then reality sank in as Richard, my British GPS voice, announced in his thick accent that we would be arriving at our destination at 10:07pm. As I looked around the car I knew we were all thinking the same thing. It was impossible to drive to Calgary, eat dinner, get dressed and hop in a limo before 10pm. I glanced around again I couldn’t help but let out a burst of laughter –wow were the boys in for a treat!

We all looked hot dressed in our lime green camp He Ho Ha baggy t-shirts, which were in need of a good washing. Our hair looked lovely, thrown up with the purpose of keeping it out of our eyes, not even one hint of make-up on any of our faces …yep, we were limo ready.

“Alright how are we going to do this?” I asked the other girls.
“Well, we could do drive through for dinner” suggested Hillary, the driver of the car.
“Yea, and we can get dressed in the car!” exclaimed Emily.
“Do you remember how hard it was to close the trunk, how are we going to get our clothes out of it while driving? Not going to happen” piped Jenny.
“Alright, we’ll just be super fast getting ready!”

Finally, we pulled up to Dave’s house and ran to the door with all our bags! It was already five after 10. As we stood on the steps we came to the realization that they had already left. “Are you kidding me! We were not even ten minutes late and they couldn’t wait! Emily you should call and see where they are!” We all stood there with scowls plastered on our faces, ranting and raving about these boys. Emily finally got a hold of Dave and his friends, and they said they would be there in two minutes to pick us up. Once again we were thrilled. We found the not-so-hidden house key underneath the porch rug and all bounded for the first room we could find. It was chaos; zip went the suitcases, then the clothes went flying around the room! Clothes changed, make-up and hair done all in two minutes –impressive but exhausting, let me tell you!

The limo pulled up and the boys were yelling for us to hurry. We scurried around grabbing our last minute, needed accessories and headed for the limo. We piled into the limo with barely any room or time to spare. I couldn’t help but smile, the night had already been so eventful and it was only the beginning!

5 comments:

  1. Cassie, this was fun to read because it sounds like you were really having a good time. I liked lines in the dialogue like "So I just talked to Dave" because it sounds realistic, rather than intentionally written and unnatural the way dialogue can often cound. My favourite part is the first scene, with everyone looking around and waiting for the meeting to be over and the weekend to start. It perfectly described the way I feel when class is just about to end! I think the rest of the story could use a little bit more dislogue or "showing," but you did use good descriptions like "We found the not-so-hidden house key underneath the porch rug and all bounded for the first room we could find. It was chaos; zip went the suitcases, then the clothes went flying around the room!" Those sentences make me awake of what is happening, and I can picture it in my mind.
    Good job!

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  2. Haha I really enjoyed this because being a girl I can relate. Getting ready in 2 minutes is very impressive, high five for you! The limo must have been so exciting and it sounds like your days off were good ones. I really liked the line "zip went the suitcases, then the clothes went flying around the room!" I could hear the suitcases and imagine the clothes flying across the room as you are frantically running about. So good job I really enjoyed reading it :)

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  3. This is such a great post. The picture at the end completely makes it.

    It's amazing how fast a five hour drive can be when you're excited (or how slow). If you wanted to, you could go into more detail about the drive. Kind of like a girls version of road trip complete with all the queeling and mayhem of a bunch of girls in a car. You would definitely need to go way longer than a blog post though, but it's something to consider.

    "We all looked hot dressed in our lime green camp He Ho Ha baggy t-shirts, which were in need of a good washing. Our hair looked lovely, thrown up with the purpose of keeping it out of our eyes, not even one hint of make-up on any of our faces …yep, we were limo ready."

    I literally laughed out loud when I read this. I like how it ties in with your other story. It gives variety yet continuity.

    Awesome post!

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  4. Hey Cassie,

    I enjoyed your post. I really liked the language you chose throughout your piece, it helped emphasize the tone you were trying to convey. For example in the beginning you use words like "boucing" and "shifting": these help establish the emotion of anticipation in the room. Also, later when you are all rushing to get ready, you use "bounded" to show the chaotic nature of the scene.

    Like Whitney I thought that the dialogue parts were realistic.

    It is impressive that you girls managed to get ready on time!

    Look forward to reading more.

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  5. Hello Cassie!

    I enjoyed this; it is a good, fun story. There were several great moments, such as when the three of you had to jump on the trunk to get it shut and when you found the “not-so-hidden house key”. Good imagery!

    I did notice some small grammar mistakes scattered throughout the post, such as “I glanced around again I couldn’t help but let out a burst of laughter”. I usually write in Microsoft word because of the fact that it fixes a lot of those mistakes automatically. So that is definitely something I would recommend. Also, I believe some of the events needed alittle bit more description, to reinforce the tone and theme. What kind of music was being played in the car while you were blazing towards Calgary? There are always great conversations on road trips like that, what did you girls talk about?

    Good job Cassie! You have some great stories to tell!

    - Jeremy

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